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24 moons to live By: Zomoguustar (an oldie for runtees)

 
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Girmluhk



Joined: 21 Aug 2002
Posts: 6394
Character Skills: Loud Mouth, Goofball, Cooking

PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2002 9:41 pm    Post subject: 24 moons to live By: Zomoguustar (an oldie for runtees) Reply with quote

…this was definitely not the cider.
In his lifetime, Zomoguustar had learned many things. First among those was: Being dragged down into the gratch hungree box by a hoard of what can only be described as heavily armored squirrels was never, ever good.
CLANG
…ohhh unconscious again…

…The courtroom was too small to entreat the entire Zomoguustar, so only his head immerged from the ridiculously small oaken double-doors. The rest of his body was lost behind him, crammed into an unseen hallway. Zomo flicked his peepers around the room. Many squirrels sat around him, gibbering in their native toung. One squirrel in particular, a great golden creature with a long, bushy tail, was vocal above the rest.

Grand Squirrel: “Fellow members of this tribunal, we come together today to force this Orc to face the crimes, committed by his race, against all of squirrel kind!”

Squirrel 2: “What’s going on?”
Squirrel 3: “Does this involve nuts?”

Grand Squirrel: “For years, the orcs have forced us to live as a second-rate race! Hoarding all the natural resources given to us by the great and omnipotent squirreless, may her golden acorn never tarnish.”

Squirrel 3: “Nut collection?”
Squirrel 2: “Storage of said nuts?”

Squirrel 4: “What about pinecones?”
Squirrel 5: Raises paw “YEAH! I like pinecones.”
Squirrel 3: “Lets not lose the thread of the conversation, What about peanuts?”
Squirrel 4: “Yeah, is it a nut or is it a pea?”
Squirrel 6: “Ahg! My brain is unfolding here! Stop talking about nuts!”
Squirrel 4: “Calm down. Here, have a nut.”

Grand Squirrel: “FORGET THE STUPID NUTS!!

Squirrels : “GASP!!”

Grand Squirrel: “Enough, translate the charges to the orc”

Squirrel interpreter: “Dem blah lats em pushdug. Dat em su yub?”

Using all his intellect and internal fortitude, Zomoguustar opened his mouth and sucked in the Squirrel interpreter, who was a little too close, and crunched happily.

Squirrel 4: “HE ATE BOB!”
Squirrel 5: “Good, I hated bob”
Grand Squirrel: “The Orc has admitted his guilt. Now he must be punished!”

A wizened gray squirrel walked around to the tip of Zomoguustars nose.

Squirrel Wizard: “KLATU…”

Zomoguustar whaled as he felt his life and memories slip away.

Squirrel Wizard: “…VERATA”

All that he was, all that defined him: Clompin, eedin, drinkin cidur, chazin feurks, duh mojo twee NUB DATS ID! NUB DUH MOJO TWEE LATS NUB TAKIN DAT UWEY!!!

Squirrel Wizard: “NIK----*”

In one great feat of strength, Zomoguustar broke his arms free from his sides and seized the Squirrlish wizard. The tiny Mojo screamed and bit at Zomo’s paw as the tribunal scattered in all directions. Roaring in anger and bloodlust, Zomo pulled his way into the courtroom head first. He crashed through the ceiling and found himself underneath the bed in the nob hut. Wizard in hand, Zomo ran to the mojo tree, praying it was still there, fearing that if he forgot it, even for a second, it would vanish. But it had not.

“MOJO!!! Zomo nub kan remenbur fingies!!!! LAT TEEFED ZOMOZ REMENBURIN FINGIES!! GIB BAK!!”

Squirlish Wizard: “It cannot be undone!! For your crimes, you must die and that you will do bwhaahhaahah…squeak. You have but 24 of your “MUUNZ” left to be on this “urz” BWAHAHAHAH…squeak.”

“Zomo gun eed lat ib nub gib bak remenburin fingies!!!!”

Squirlish Wizard: “FEH! If it will mean my freedom, you may have memories, be they of little use to you in the short time you have left.”

Squirrel Wizard: “IV-GEY IM-HEY IRRLISH-SQUEY EMORIES-MEY”

And with that the Squirrel Wizard was eaten. Zomo sat up, brushed himself off and went off to gather nuts.

What?!

…To be continued…





Zomo continute it!



Last edited by Girmluhk on Tue Jun 29, 2004 5:17 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Zomoguustar



Joined: 17 Sep 2002
Posts: 142
Character Skills: Gathering nuts, storage preservation sed nuts.

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2002 7:16 pm    Post subject: Wow Reply with quote

I can't believe this is still around! Long time ago!!

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It mattered little to him where they sailed or whom they fought, so long as they sailed and fought. He found the life good. -Conan of Cimmeria by Robert E. Howard
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Girmluhk



Joined: 21 Aug 2002
Posts: 6394
Character Skills: Loud Mouth, Goofball, Cooking

PostPosted: Tue Sep 17, 2002 7:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Heck zomo i saved it on my computer, its too funny..

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Zomoguustar



Joined: 17 Sep 2002
Posts: 142
Character Skills: Gathering nuts, storage preservation sed nuts.

PostPosted: Mon Sep 23, 2002 2:25 am    Post subject: Well I am flattered Reply with quote

As for the Squirrel dialogs about nuts, I must give all credit to the author of the web comic Okashi na okashi (strange candy).

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It mattered little to him where they sailed or whom they fought, so long as they sailed and fought. He found the life good. -Conan of Cimmeria by Robert E. Howard
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Ug'Hag



Joined: 11 Oct 2002
Posts: 599
Character Skills: Maurk Trainer

PostPosted: Sun Jan 05, 2003 3:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

*bump*
har har!


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Thor'zug



Joined: 30 Nov 2002
Posts: 1221
Character Skills: GM Humie Klomper

PostPosted: Tue Jan 07, 2003 10:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

YUB! finizch wut lat ztarded! It am bubhush! Hurhur me likke huw... uh... da skwirl mojo blahed "skweek" avter im blah'd "BWAHAHAH" Hur... *shakes heads* Zee! kuz, hym skwurill! agh...uh ... dat maker id FUNNIE!!! LAT GEDZ ID!? hur.. kuz...kuz um, id am liddle punie szweek... uh, avter hym blahed byg uld BWAHAHAH... ZEEEE!?... lats ged id? *sigh* Krath, lats am tupid!

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Ghul'Ruk



Joined: 20 Aug 2002
Posts: 1946
Character Skills: Getting wood, Clomping, Preaching, Burning

PostPosted: Tue Jan 07, 2003 11:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Bah. Pozd! Pozd rezd ogh zturi!

*turnz imz bak, zturtz waybun imz urmz, agh zturtz ub ash chunt*

POZD! POZD! POZD! POZD!

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Thor'zug



Joined: 30 Nov 2002
Posts: 1221
Character Skills: GM Humie Klomper

PostPosted: Wed Jan 08, 2003 10:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

uhgggg...yub

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Girmluhk



Joined: 21 Aug 2002
Posts: 6394
Character Skills: Loud Mouth, Goofball, Cooking

PostPosted: Tue Jun 29, 2004 5:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

*bumps for the sake of the gruntees*

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Krunk



Joined: 07 Dec 2002
Posts: 384

PostPosted: Tue Jun 29, 2004 5:47 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

well, it's kinda like a third of a story or half.. I cannot tell... why doesn't someone finish it plz? *looks for zomo*

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Girmluhk



Joined: 21 Aug 2002
Posts: 6394
Character Skills: Loud Mouth, Goofball, Cooking

PostPosted: Tue Jul 15, 2008 6:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

*bump*

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